My knickers keep digging into my skin. 
This is by far the most uncomfortable underwear I’ve worn in my 21 years of life. Ever. 
Why? Because it burns!!! All the rubber and spandex and decorations and whatnot. 

The last, for sure. Unless I cannot help the situation.
I.e getting trapped in the most remote village in East Africa after sleep-walking out of my grandmother’s grass-thatched hut far off deep into the woods hence life leaving me stuck in the middle of a grassland in the scorching sun at noon in my pajamas and last-night’s underwear (which is obviously 100% organic cotton comfortable) and hopefully, some Uggs or boots of some sort.

I am not shopping at fancy underwear stores anymore. No. I need to find some where to buy healthy linen. Perhaps some earth (natural) colored 100% organic cotton briefs and brassieres. Maybe a little lace and floral prints here and there but the picture of is quite vivid. Yes? Comfortable unbiased non-commercialised, organic, nontoxic underwear that is going to let me breathe and make my life, and consequently those of the people around me, that much more pleasant. 
I need this. 
I deserve it. 
This is a right I am owed by the company in whom I (will) entrust my most intimate of concerns with. My breasts and hoo-ha!

Fancy overly-commercialized, neon-colored, I-wanna-look-bad-in-this-maroon-lacewaist-zebra print-rhinestone-glitter-leopard print-thong-when-people-see-me-in-it- because-of-the-words-on-the-lime-green-crouch. 
Never again. 
“Most comfortable” boyshort bikinis; yeah right!